diligin ng suka ang uhaw na lumpia

for real,this is a title of a filipino movie back in 1987.how imaginative.i will leave it to your judgement as to what kind of movie genre this was.and i swear that i did not watch it.

well, having been in sick bay since after the men’s health run,i could not but help compare myself with an uhaw na lumpia yearning for a suka dip.i don’t like the sound of tigang na lupa.makes me feel old.

even when i felt that i was not sure of today’s outcome or how my body would react without the benefit of an acceptable workout for the past 2 weeks,i made sure i was ready for the worst.

together with me hc friends,mari,lester and jay c u plus our very supportive ivy,we made it to luneta with plenty of time to spare.jay nacino soon arrived and so did doc joe and albert henson,jeff abenina and isko lapira(who,by the way,just did the botak100 last sunday and was treating the 42 as a recovery run).jay n. and i sort of  treated this as a reunion run.i met jay for the first time at the very same spot last year when i did my 1st full.after the usual chit chat and picture-taking, we finally started our quest for a finals slot.

km 1-10. as in all rudy b. races(today was a box-office hit by the way),we were off on time.lester,jay and i paced ourselves ever so conscious of sticking to our plan.mari,well,was storming away in the front.we would slow down when we felt we were going fast and speed up when we were slow.with our roving bike support and our official hc car support ably piloted by ivy, we were making headway with our plans.the 1st 10k covered the whole of roxas blvd from km 0 to the corner af airport road up to the vicinity of buendia/taft.the road was cordoned off for runners.

km 11-20.things were going well still.we were gaining precious minutes and in fact, we were ahead by 6 minutes.the mental checkpoints i had in my mind corresponded to the times i wanted and even better.but as you know some plans don’t work as wished.at the kalayaan flyover entering the fort,lester signalled that he had cramps and slowed down but caught up with me soon after at the vicinity of mckinley hill.the 2-week running respite i had was somewhat rewarding in the sense that my legs felt no pain but they were kinda heavy.surprisingly,all milo aid stations were distanced apart pretty well and fully-equipped so to speak.sponges and water trucks were present.marshals galore especially in the intersections.btw,i was at the mcdonald’s/s&r area entering the fort at 1:43 and this is where i met the leading runner.

km 21-30.after the u-turn near the marine hq,we headed for bayani road.it was in the heritage area that it started to rain.really now,a rudy b race isn’t just complete without rain,it seems.anyway,the rains helped as it was getting hot as the sun was starting to shine.the relief made me run even better after the u-turn near c5.i was able to tackle the uphills along bayani and essensa with little problems.still and all, upon reaching the 30k mark at 3 hours,i thought i had a borderline chance at the 4-hour qualifying time.so i coasted towards the kalayaan flyover where queenie and jinoe plus the takbo peeps were kind enought to offer me gatorade(thank you!).

km31-42. at the flyover just when i thought the worst would soon be over as far as inclines,disaster was knocking.my legs suddenly got heavy.the whisperings of my fellow runner that he won’t make it was of no help.i got slower by the minute.upon reaching the downward part,i tried to speed up to make up for lost time.no go.here,things started to unravel.times and my mental checkpoints were not in sync by this time and the discrepancies were getting bigger.i was losing the fight for four quickly. approaching  chino roces, a familar voice sounded off.it was coach salazar hot on my heels with mesh in tow.no amount of prodding from coach could speed me up.my legs were heavier more than ever.as soon as i lost sight of the two,i knew that the battle for me was over.in front of ccp where my time should have ideally been at most 3:30 to make it,my watch showed 3:58.way off.i slowed down farther knowing that i would have to make a supersonic dash to make it.no sooner,sir jovie overtook me and handed a gu gel and pushed me to keep in step with him.i did.for 200 meters,i did.after that,my right hams down to the calf got a jolt.cramps were creeping.i bade sir jovie to go ahead.the fight was over.close to but not exactly walking,i made it to the finish line.my watch timed me at 4:28:18 but oddly enough,the official timer had 4:27:12.my 1st 21k was 1:58.the rest was done in 2:30.

at the waiting area,i saw and chatted with kim who did 21k.vener and christie,enrico and bookie of gold’s gym.and charlie who is slowly but surely coming back to the racing scene.more picture taking here.

anyway,the ordeal over,i was relieved that i made it.this was a confidence-booster for me.at least,i can still nail long distances.of course,i would have been 42 times more delighted if i did 4 hours.but i can’t complain.i was off the road for 2 weeks except for an accumulated 20-kilometer treadmill run spread over 5 days.the rest were spent in bed.

for whatever it’s worth,the consolation was that i was able to cut some 5 minutes from my previous milo run last november.

and so,the road to the milo finals remains a dream.to bandit again ,that is the question.october is crowded by 3 marathons and the adidas 21k.then there is singapore come december.

before i end,congratulations are in order.to jay nacino,my man,bravo for nailing a finals berth.my hats off to you for sticking diligently to your training program of which i was a witness many times over.vener,as usual, is a qualifier.to the t2 girls,you rock.special mention goes to mesh(fortunes indeed change quickly.if at 4:30am i was uhaw na lumpia,before the race ended,i became a chicked boy all over again.not that i mind)for qualifying.to albert henson of camanava,ayos pare.and of course to my hc buds, mari and martin for giving the team hc something to be proud of by qualifying.mabuhay!

of course,to my bdm classmates who did the botak100 last sunday and were brave enough to do this milo as recovery and qualify for the finals,wow,you are something.raffy,albert,isko,george and ronnie plus gene.iba na ang may pinagsamahan!

and of course, i would not have made it without these people whose unsolicited help and generosity helped me  through.to ivy, our team car support driver and photog for volunteering to support the hcs.(she was supposed to do a beach shoot but at the last  minute chose to shoot us hcs-the sons of beaches).i know you didn’t miss the beach at all sister.to dess for giving me much-needed supplies on the way back.sir jovie for giving me that gu gel for that 1 last push.to atty jeff abenina ,col oscar lopez(pa) and coach salazar for their words of encouragement.to queenie and jinoe and the takbo peeps for your unselfishness.and to that anonymous lady who handed me gatorade near the roxas/buendia flyover.after handing me that,she asked if i was bugobugo.answering in the affirmative,i was informed that she is regular visitor.sa inyong lahat,maraming salamat po!

ayos na rin ito.nadiligan ako ng suka.basang lumpia na ako.

ngayon,may asim na uli ako.

transformers 2:revenge of the felons?

november 2008 was the time the hc’s did the milo bandit run.

bandits therefore,that makes us felons.

we will have a shot at rising and being legit tomorrow for october 2009.

the magic numbers to remember are 3:59:59.9.this will be good enough.otherwise,we will call it sub-sub and not sub-4.

good luck to all,virgins or otherwise.

switch to raceday mode-HARD ON!

“you’ve got to ask yourself one question:

…do you feel lucky? well, do ya, punk? ” -Dirty Harry,1971

well harry,i certainly am lucky to have friends who have wished me well in this time of r and r.

i woke up today at around 8 in the morning wondering what i was doing in bed so late.it was a sunday like other sundays past. but i was sure i was missing something here.then i remembered my friends doing the botak100.

this is the 1st sunday that i did not run a race nor do an lsd or a runabout for as long as i can remember.and it felt different.totally.

finding nothing worthy to do than to just leaf through the sunday papers and watch the never-ending coverage of the moonwalker,i decided to bring myself to the gym for a 3o-minute treadmill thing and a short weight-lifting workout.bad decision.i felt feverish as soon as i was done.i really do not know what’s going on.i just hope i will be strong enough to get up for the milo42 come sunday.

and before the clock struck 12 noon,i got the message that the first wave of finishers of the botak100 were done as early as 9am.isko,ralph and albert(run2dmoon) soon checked in after lunch and before 7pm came, my friends ronaldrei,ronnie(runnerforchrist),george(the talking machine),cesar and rico were done as well.coach salazar and ellen tolentino put in their licks too.good job guys-congratulations! you deserve a good feed/massage/sleep/happy ending for all the hard work you did today.that goes for the 50k finishers too!welcome to the ultra world.rejoice-you got yourselves devirginized!

anyway,here’s to all you guys who dropped me some good wishes on the net and some text messages too-thank you very much!

i feel lucky to have friends like you.may god bless you and your loved ones.and your-not-so-loved-ones.

what the heck.and your loved-once too.

an “exorcise” in futility

“well, i am running down the road tryin’ to lose some load…take it easy, don’t let the sound of your own wheels drive you crazy….lighten up while you still can.don’t even try to understand.just find a place to make your stand….”-the eagles,take it easy.

 a mere 1 kilometer into the men’s health 15k race last sunday and i started to feel weird.my legs got heavy and my head was having a sensation.things that never happened to me before,not in races nor training days.

i was hoping that as soon as i would sweat along the way,i would feel better.i did my usual pre-race rituals and all.as the kilometers passed by,my legs and head got heavier however.slowly but surely,i was fading fast.i counted at least 7 runners passing me by at km 8 or so.as much as i wanted to push myself,i just could not.i was ready for my 2nd dnf,on trail again no less.the frequent zigzags on the route did not help.i became more disoriented and felt like throwing up at some point.

but with one last push,i drove hard for the finish line if only to avoid getting “chicked” again.i was successful by an arm’s length.finally,the ordeal was over.at least for the race.

i was feeling so bad i did not stay for the post-race festivities.mark parco aka VO2,who was with me at some point of the race,quipped that i wasn’t sweating like he did after the race when we saw each other again at the parking lot.this was getting weirder.i would and should have been sweating but i was not.i brushed the thought aside and chatted with my hc buds.but i started to have a splitting headache that prompted jay to give me a pain reliever.i downed it and upon reaching mcdonald’s in slex on the way back,the pain was gone.but i was still dizzy.

but my legs were still heavy.i was trying to recall what i did the previous day/s that might have contributed to all these.i was clearly in no mood to eat.i barely ate my pancakes.i thought i would feel better as the day wore on.

but that would not be the case.

finally home,i felt very weak and was having palpitations again just like what i had during the race proper.i wasn’t able to wash my running clothes and trail shoes as i am wont to do.i took a shower and headed for bed and promptly fell like a log.i was so sleepy,in pain and very weak.that was around 11am or so.

when i woke up at around 4pm,things were no better.i was feverish and aching all over.i took the necessary medicines and hydrated like i never did.ate a late lunch.went back to bed in the hope that more rest would make me feel good.nothing.when i woke up at around 9pm,i felt just as bad so i decided to stay in bed.

on monday,i could not even get up without feeling dizzy.the a(h1n1) news that kept coming on tv wasn’t helping either.i was feeling feverish but my temperature showed that i was normal.i took another dose of medicine and hydrated some more.ate a ton for breakfast and went back to bed.for the first time,i skipped a day-after recovery run.this week was supposed to be taper week for botak.

tuesday came and i was hoping that i would be better.but my head was still heavy and i was having palpitations time and again.i was sweating coldly too.worried now, i texted doc joe if i had that dreaded flu virus.he did not think so.another text for a 2nd opinion and i was told to have a complete blood test.i gave myself until wednesday to see if i would feel good.the medicines over the counter were not helping.again,no workouts whatsoever today.

wednesday morning came and i finally decided to have the tests.i was feeling just as bad.all these 3 days ,i tried to do things as normal but with a heavy feeling all over.i got my results later in the afternoon.all readings were normal thankfully.

so what was wrong with me?was i burned out or something?i browsed the internet and clicked “overfatigue”.what i saw sort of surprised me.the symptoms were similar to what i was experiencing the past few days.the cures were there too.and the doctor’s verdict was to get more rest.nothing.wednesday passed and that was 3rd day of inactivity.

thursday and friday came with no physical activities whatsoever except the mouth exercises in excess of 3 times a day.there would be spells of dizziness and palpitations.and the thought of skipping botak altogether was looming large.

not again,not on an ultra.not when i am on a mission.things would have been different if this race were just a a 10k run but this is not.when will the next ultra be?next to a dnf, a dns is another dreaded term.

much as i wanted to attend the carbo loading last night,i chose to stay home and gain more rest in the hope that it would translate to recovery.

i asked around for advices and the answers were unanimous,rest and recover some more.

so today saturday morning, i literally am resting my case(run).another first for me.on an ultra race again.dns.

i thank you all dear friends for your invaluable pieces of advice and willingness to support me during the race proper.but as it is,the exorcism will have to wait.for now,i would have to cool my heels till march 5,2010 and vent all my frustrations during the 2nd bdm and hopefully finish again.

the tnf will come.in hindsight,i was thinking that finishing botak100 would not have diminish the ignominy of the tnf fiasco.it will have to take a tnf100 trail run no less for the exorcism to be completely satisfying.that’s is going to be another story and struggle.

and so i say to all botak ultra runners going at it tonight,good luck and may you be all successful in your quests.to all you ultra virgins,savor the moment for you are virgins just once-at least for the distance.take baby steps at the start.you will be thankful you did especially when you are at the latter part of the race.

i will miss ya’ all  while i will gently sleep.and rest and recover some more.

ano ang tawag sa running mode ng mga hardcore tuwing araw ng karera?

mga kapwa kong mananakbo,

parang basketball yan.kung mga basketball players,may game face.

ano naman ang sa hardcores?

ang tamang sagot ay makakakuha ng free guided/escorted 100-kilometer run with complete support vehicle,logistics,18 hours worth of stories and post-race hands-on happy ending sa sunday, 28 june 2009.kita-kits  midnight of saturday sa u.p. to claim your prize.

the more, the many-er.

nagmamahal ng lubos,

t’yo paeng

i’m never gonna run again

i’m never gonna run again.

running legs gotta painful feeling.

though it’s easy to try,the race is just so hard.

should have known better how to run this race.

and shouldn’t have wasted all my lsd’s,speed,tempo and cruise interval drills.

never again.

until the next run.

the exorcism

12 midnight.

06.28.09

will i be home free?

or will the  nightmare continue?

if all you’ve got is a hammer,everything looks like a nail.

you got races to run,so run them.back to back if that’s the case.

after tnf , i went back to the usual sunday races.so far, i nailed the ie8 8 mile run, the mizuno infinity 15k run and this weekend’s back to back-all terra 10k trail run and the 1st ptaa 10km run at u.p in succession.good therapy these runs i tell you.

not much really especially that the 1st 2 races(ie8-1:09 +, mizuno15-1:16 +) were characterized by heavy legs.perhaps it is the ultramarathon leg memory that was still in play.for whatever reason,i finished them no matter how slow i was a running or how bad i felt.runner’s blues is what i think they call it.in fact ,i ran mizuno so bad at least 5 runners overtook me from the kalayaan flyover on the way back.and no matter how much i willed my legs to go faster,nada.i’d say that mizuno was my worst performance next to tnf.

however,this weekend was kinda different.i finally completed my 1st trail run (1:01:10) however puny in distance.and as a dessert, i did the 10k yesterday in u.p.(48:38). the diliman route holds a special place in my heart as this is where i first went sub-50 last december 2008 at the ictus run with rio as organizer as it was yesterday.

well, the trail certainly lured much less in terms of runners but the sights and sounds and terrain were something else.it was worth all the trip to timberland. looking back,i wish i took more time to savor the view.all i could do was to take quick glances at the metropolis(smoggy) and the area around the route.at least,i was able to put to good use all the trail stuff i got for tnf.better battered and muddied than inhabited by cockroaches and dusting away.not to mention the lessons learned from tnf. i was glad that my mind and body were in complete  sync this time.wherever i said “go”, my legs just blasted away. needless to say,i would be happy to come back next year.

as for u.p., i was prepared to tackle the new route as presented in the race packet but at the last minute,the route was reverted to the same old route.a friend later told me that residents along the initial route requested the diversion.it was a box office hit in terms of attendance.but honestly,i was there hoping to win the raffle prizes more than anything else.nonetheless, it was a good 10k tempo run.and recovery run of sorts from the trail run  last saturday.boy were my legs heavy from the start.but as in timberland, mind and body were in tune again.

i think i am getting back into the groove.

keep hammering!

he who suffers, remembers.

let me thank all of you guys who were kind enough to post comments in my previous post(a good hurt).

i won’t be able thank you enough for all your words of encouragement and upliftment during my low times.

while i try to move on and pile up some kilometers again, the dnf at tnf, both firsts for me, has not deterred me a bit from pursuing this one passion that i have had for past a year now.

honestly,the failure ,at first, was  like a ghost that haunted me ceaselessly but  i have learned to live by it and leave it by the wayside and just go on with my day as normal as can be.the memories will surely  remain forever and i can only learn from the failure.it has left me hungry.

i shall move on but i think that the best option is to run forward and take it all the way to where it matters the most.

again,thank you guys and may the good lord bless you all.

a good hurt

“most dreams die a slow death.they’re conceived in a moment of passion,with the prospect of endless possibilities,but often languish and are not pursued with the same heartfelt intensity as when first born.slowly,subtly,a dream becomes elusive and ephemeral….”- dean karnazes,ultramarathoner

i dreamed of running the tnf100 solo,supposedly my 1st ultramarathon on trail.here is my story.

on may 23 at 4:00am at the clark expo grounds which served as the tnf base camp,i started my pursuit for that other half of my ultra dream-the ultra trail.not even the pain of my 1st road ultra at bdm last april would prevent me from going after tnf.

slowly but surely,i made my way together with my solo buddies,arman and isko.and my relay friends jay,dess and mitch.it was an uneventful run up until sacobia bridge  where we finally hit trail by running under the bridge and had a taste of the lahar grounds.i felt good running on soft ground.the riverbeds which i was expecting to have flowing water were mostly dry.a good sign i thought.

this was not to be.after about 5k of running on dry ground.i came upon the 1st river crossing and as planned,i changed to my sandals if only to preserved my feet from blisters early on.those sandals alone were such a burden to carry but i wanted to be safe than sorry.and so i crossed my 1st watery riverbed then after a few minutes decided to slip back to my trail shoes thinking that the next river crossing would be far enough.no sooner,another river crosing loomed but having sensed that i have lost too much time changing footwear,i just decided to cross the river head-on.no more switching of footwear.and for the rest of the route,that was what i did.

everything was going well according to pace plan and all until i reached the haduan section.we were forewarned by race organizers and friends about the difficulty of running this area.in fact,the 2nd loop for the 10k relay would skip this area because of the dangers it would present if ran during nightfall.true enough, this is where i encountered ascents and descents that i haven’t really done in a long,long time.it took so much out of me that i could almost hear my heart beat.my chest was pounding and i was sweating like crazy.no way i could run this part.the walking surely has began.

in haduan,i finally reached a small community of aetas who were kind enough to show me the directions and soon i was back on river bed where the hanging bridge was.along various points in this section,marshals would check my number and log my name for recording.i thought that the hardest part was over.

from the river bed,i made my way up again towards as1 and as2 way up there i don’t really know where.still in the company of arman,jay and isko,i tackled the trails with gusto,no doubt aided by a caffeine drink that kept me energized.i felt good doing the race so far.i witnessed a beautiful sunrise and the view of arayat from where i was doing the trail.isko would pace the group and as i would find out later,isko is or was a mountainclimber before he switched to running.he has done mt. apo and all the challenging peaks around the country.and so,i entrusted the pacing and all to him.on parts where he slowed,i did.and on parts he would run,i did too.or at least i tried.

finally,i had my real 1st break at as2 which according to the map published by tnf was at km19.here,i was able to refill my bladder and take in some crackers.along the way,i was wondering when the uphills would stop.i wrongly thought that haduan was it as i was told.there were more climbs and descents more than i would care to count at this point.i was beginning to tire out.the climbs seemed endless.not that the descents were relaxing anyway.my knees were pounded just as hard as the climbs.

and there were the seemingly endless river crossings too.time and again,when things started to dry up,a waterway would beckon.no choice but just forge on with shoes on.

at one point,i chanced upon a small upland community and i was surprised to find out that this was sto nino,bamban,tarlac.i was lucky to find a sari-sari store which not only offered cold drinks but also had cooked rice(never mind if it was burnt) and sardines that really tasted like heaven. and  free mongo to boot.at this point,any home-cooked food certainly tasted better than all the laboratory-made stuff  i was ramming down my mouth.ripe mango was good for 5 bucks per and 4 ripe papayas at 20 pesos.not bad.the joy of living in the country side.the lady of the house was gracious to a fault and was aptly named mercy.my companions left 200 pesos for her to prepare food for our return trip that same day.

walked more i did.till i got to that climb just before as3.boy,was that a climb!i would take 5 steps and stop.another 5 then stop.3 then stop.mercifully,there was a rope to cling on to but the end of the rope offered no relief.there were still a few meters left to climb.and again.and again.till mp.

after checking in at as3,i made my way towards as4,supposedly a mere 3-4k away.that seemed eternity.for that matter,all the kilometer signs seemed to take like eternity to finish.climb and descend sideways, straightup-i did just about everything just to get through.

finally,as4 was in view but before that was a steep descent which required a rope.rapel down was more like it.no way i would go down without holding on to the rope for dear life.with my butt leading the way and my face kissing the mountain side,i slowly made my way down. and as4 was were i finally got hold of my dropbag.i chose to unload my sandals which i did not use anymore and some stuff i really did not have any use for.i refilled my bottles with my gatorade supply and had some crackers again.this was km35 and around 2pm.the sun was well way up burning my neck.

we finally made it to civilization on the road leading to sacobia bridge.still,this portion was a challenge with another seemingly endless uphill trek.before the bridge ,i took a left turn towards another trail that would lead me all the way to the riverbed once again and onto that mp station that read 8.9k to base.but the tnf  map indicated 45k so it should have been 5k to base.which is which?

i looked at my watch.it was 4pm.at the rate i was going,i reckoned to reach base at 6pm.i did my math and if things would go as it was,i would be left with 16 hours to complete the 2nd 50.borderline finish if ever.

here, the thought of stopping at km50 entered my mind seriously.then,somebody whispered  to me-”let’s just drink the night away and sleep…”i tried to laugh it off but in true adam fashion,i succumbed to eve’s temptation.well,not yet really.i still wanted to do it-run.but my defenses seemed to crumble down in the face of this onslaught of a temptation.i seemed helpless in dealing with the urge.i was like a damsel in distress being pursued by a knight in shining armor or shall i say, the bearer of bad news? it seemed like an itch i couldn’t do away with a simple scratch.

then,it started to rain like the end of the world.it rained like crazy and so hard visibility was almost zero.the winds were so powerful that the rains were not falling down vertically but horizontally! here,i started to run again having been invigorated by the relief 0f the rain.however,the thought to stop altogether kept ringing in my head all the more.if i had a hard time doing the climbs in relatively dry conditions and daytime earlier,how much more difficult would it be during night time and in wet/muddy conditions?

i reached base camp at km50 at 5:07pm and logged in.that meant that i was running 13hours and 7 minutes for the 1st 50k.i had 17 hours to spare for the next 50k.i was over by 1:07h by my own target time of 12h halfway.

then i saw what happend to the start/finish area.a freak weather just like what i encountered the last 8k happened here as well.everything was in shambles including rio’s afro.then he told me that the race was on hold.the runners ahead were instructed to stay put at the different mp’s as rio’s team would assess the river/trail conditions.

that was the clincher and put the final nail on my decision so to speak.i found it difficult not knowing when to be called back.the long wait would surely make me stiff and tight.so i sat on the ground,removed my shoes and ate my mcdonald’s lunch.i made my decision to stop altogether.my 1st dnf.

later on,run resumed at 7:30pm long after a few solo runners chose to go home instead.somehow,i felt that an undeserved(not credited to the 30-hour limit) 2.5 hour rest for me would not make me feel good about completing the ultramarathon in a “purist” sense.i wanted an ultramarathon with respites yes, but with time running.that way,i would be sort of pressured into running(or walking) a little faster just to make it to the cutoff.still a number of solo and relay runners pursued the 2nd loop but with a modification that had a 20k road run instead of  just 10k as originally announced.i guess that took a little fun out of the trail.

i shoved my stuff in my car,headed for my hotel,took a shower and had dinner then after sharing a few stories between shots of johnny walker with my friends,hit the sack and slept soundly,aching body and all.how i wish i would get such a quality sleep before a big race like tnf.

at 6am,i woke up to isko’s message about the race resumption.then all seemed to start sinking in.i was a loser this time.yes,i did 50 but what good is that?i signed up for a hundred and i should have done the hundred no less.this is supposed to be hundred trail run for crying out loud.but i had no one to curse or get angry with but myself and myself alone.i had only myself to blame.

i did not have the appetite to have breakfast and even if i ate,it did not do me any good.i felt worse when i saw my fellow runners getting their finisher’s plate.deep inside,i knew that i was better than just 50k.

in hindsight,the absence of my will and my lack of mental toughness did me in.i totally forgot the lessons and mental preparations i had for my bataan ultra.i was adam (eating the apple) personified.

“i felt awful.the list of those i’d disappointed was long.not only did i let down those who supported me along the way…had i let myself down?the pain ran much deeper than that.i wasn’t even much worthy of consideration.i didn’t matter…my honor was shattered…and i eased up on myself.yes,i had failed-but i had been an spectacular failure,gloriously disintegrating every aspect of my body…”.-dean k.

i wouldn’t have traded all the pain i would have gotten had i only completed my 100.but as they say,you win some.you lose some.i just hope to come out of this failure a better runner so to speak.

this was a good hurt,physically,mentally and emotionally.i surely have learned my lesson the hard way.

i should have sang ” ain’t no mountain high enough,ain’t no river wide enough to keep me away…” to keep my sanity intact.maybe,i could have done it better.

“boy,did i know defeat.there was really no defeat more devastating than running oneself onto the ground short of the finish line….it was pure,unadulterated defeat.but what i came to realize on the drive home was that i’d loved every second of it.”.-dean k.

i was pounded into submission.i felt like hatton,barrera,marquez and worst,dela hoya-combined.

1st river crossing and changing to sandals

mp at a river crossing

 

 

 

I’LL BE BACK.